Just Breathe

Ahhh...I'm starting to feel better emotionally, mentally, physically--all of it. We decided to take a break from all this baby stuff. We are taking our "foot" off the throttle and just slowing it down to a more reasonable pace. It's amazing how obsessive it can be and how it can take over your life if you let it! I must admit that when we were told the IVF didn't work and that we might be done trying for good there was a feeling of...relief. I mean, through all of this I wanted to know can we have kids? If the answer is no, then I am disappointed but hey that's an answer! Can I please get back to my life now? Thank you.

Before all this baby stuff, I was an avid runner. I loved caffeine, sushi, spontaneous sex, etc.--all those things went by the way side once we lost our first pregnancy and aggressively began trying to get pregnant again. I thought every month that this was going to be the month so I didn't partake in non-pregnant things--until my period started and then I would drink or run or whatever for a week at a time. Now is my chance to get all that back again--to live my life the way I enjoy living it. It's time to get our lives back in order so that we can include children in our lives when we're balanced and ready.

I signed up for a fun run next weekend. I'm looking forward to it. My knee, due to all the hormones and lack of use, isn't up for anything more than a short run so I'm just going to take it slow. I'll do a little knee rehab and hopefully some day get back into running the way I used to love it!

Having said all that, we have a doctor's appointment November 16th. It's about 2 weeks away. The appointment is to go over the doctor notes from the failed IVF attempt. I'm curious to hear what they have to say, and will make an informed decision about where we go from here after that meeting. Either way, I really need to broaden my focus to include living this life and not just putting all my energy into pregnancy.