Injection School

Thursday I go to Dr B's for my suppression scan. I'll get an ultrasound to see where my follicles are in comparison to where the doctor wants them to be--suppressed. My mother is going with me for the first time to an appointment, because Luis will be out of town and after the scan we're participating in injection school! Luis will give me the nightly injections (beginning September 27th) that I can't reach ;o). I think if another set of ears are present with me in injection school, then I won't miss as much as I know I would on my own. These appointments tend to be overwhelming. I leave wishing I'd asked more questions and taken more notes...thus Mom is going with me. Also she'll be able to teach Luis how he is to give me the shots. He does not want to do it, but I say tough titty! Try being the one getting the shots. Men.

I'm not completely informed about what the injections will be, but it is all in preparation for in vitro egg retrieval October 7th in Oklahoma City. Ideally my ovaries will produce multiple eggs to increase our chances of getting pregnant this time, and will hopefully have some left over to freeze to try again later (ideally 9 months plus later!!!!!!).

p.s. If anyone would like to donate to the Luis & Missy + fund, please contact me and I can give you my bank account number at BOK! Bahahahahahahahaha! That is funny :o) But seriously call me ;o)

Brian Cremin

One of my very best friends, Brian Cremin, passed away early yesterday morning. His girlfriend, Liz, went to wake him up and he just wouldn't wake up. She is pregnant with their first child, Tristyn Marie O'Day Cremin, expected to arrive December 21st. Brian was a very big personality with a flare of his own--one of the funniest people I've ever met! He loved words, music, and his family. He contributed to Tulsa's local music scene for many years with his talent for rap and hip hop. I miss him very much. Love you, B!

We Are Big Time Now

Looks like we are heading for in vitro. We are big time now!

We visited with Dr. B Monday about in vitro in OCTOBER!!!! We're super psyched. Why? Well it is not because it's going to cost us around $12,000 or that I will be giving myself shots again or that we have to sit on the bench for 2 month in preparation for the in vitro process. We are excited, because this IS going to work!! Keeping my eye on the prize...visualizing the goal line...expecting the best (I hear that helps in the process :o)).

Our chances greatly increase from about 7% on my own to 20% with IUI to 50+% with IVF!!!!!! We have been researching baby names...checking out nursery colors...saving as much $$$ as we possibly can, because babies are in our future. Finally I feel like we are on the right path...

The down side is that we are getting close to the end of our options. It definitely has not been an easy road to say the least. We experienced 2 miscarriages, years of disappointment, dozens of negative HPTs, buckets of tears, and $$$$ on surgery, procedure, perscriptions, hormones, and doctor visits for it all come down to the IVF process (with a few options thereafter including donor eggs; a sarogate; adoption). I am almost eager just to know one way or another...do we adopt or keep trying?

One of my best, and wise I might add, girlfriends once said God does not put this kind of desire in your heart to go unfulfilled. I have faith that we will have children. I do not always have patience, as you read in my previous blog, but I definitely have faith that our efforts and His will soon will give us the family we so badly want!

Peed on a stick. Negative again.

This is getting old. Why do we keep trying? I'm so sick of this!!!! How much rejection can one person handle?

Shots

I started giving myself shots last Wednesday, and I have to say it's not that bad! No pain at all...just bloating and some emotions. When I got ready to give myself my first shot, I was actually going to let Luis give it to me. I freaked out when I realized there were more vials than necessary. I called my nurse on her cell. She didn't pick up, so I called the pharmacy and talked to the pharmacist. The other vials are for later...my "trigger shot"--close to insemination. So I continued nervously with my Follistim pen.

Follistim is a natural FSH (follicle stimulation hormone). It's kinda cool. It looks like a pen. You take off the cap, load the cartridge with meds, then attach a new needle to the end every time. I wind the other end to my dosage, poke my saddle bags, then push the end as if I'm clicking a real pen and I'm injected. I'm impressed with this at-home pen thing. It's really easy.

Anyway, Luis was all trained and ready to give me the shot, then at the last minute I decided to give it to myself. I did it! I switch sides every night until at least Thursday. I have an appointment then for an ultrasound to see if my follicles are reacting to the medicine. Thursday can't get here fast enough. That's when they should decide on which day we'll inseminate. I hope it works!!!!

Insemination Time!

After this weekend of the 4th, I'll start giving myself those nightly shots to prepare for insemination!!! Eeee! We're getting serious now. Assuming I ovulate and everything goes as planned, we'll get inseminated the week of 7/19. Please say prayers for us. The chances are 10-20%, so it might take a couple tries, but we're very excited to try this new approach--called an IUI. We're hopeful.

Waiting Game

I just ate 2 pieces of chocolate. One for each shot in the butt. Didn't ovulate again this month, so I was given shots of progesterone to get it going. I'll be on the pill for 1-2 months again, then will give myself nightly shots to get ready for an IUI.

I've had a hard couple of days. It's not always easy to stay positive, but the good days outweigh the bad and tomorrow is another day.

The bright side is that while on the pill for 2 months, the pressure is off. There's nothing we can do, so might as well drink beer, work out, and practice. Babies will be here before we know it. I just need to keep my emotions in check and my eye on the prize (?). Yeah that was weak.